The voice in your head is lying to you. Here's how to fight back.

One of the hardest lessons life keeps presenting me is this:
Every single circumstance in my life happens for me, not to me.

In other words: I either achieve or I learn.

But why does this lesson keep showing up, in different shapes, forms, and aggravating moments?
Because when you're aiming for big goals,
when you're uncomfortable with where you are or what you’re doing,
the voice in your head gets loud.

Let’s talk about that voice…
The one that whispers reasons not to go after your dreams.
It says, That big goal? You’ll never make it.
Or worse, it confirms your fears:
See? You didn’t make it, you’re not enough, and now it’s too late.

I’ve spoken about this inner voice before.

Some call it Part X (hat tip to Bryan Johnson).
In my coaching certification program, we called them Gremlins.
In the Reforged Leader Program™ we call it the Ghost Code.

The name doesn’t matter.
What matters is knowing this: That voice is not you.
And one of the most important skills you can ever develop is learning how to deal with it.

When the Ghost Code Gets Loud

• It shows up in endurance sports when your glycogen is gone and your energy tanks.

• It shows up when you're about to invest in yourself, financially, emotionally, or spiritually.

• It shows up when you're stepping outside your comfort zone.

• It shows up when all you have is uncertainty and lately, uncertainty seems like the only constant.

You can hit reply with your own examples, I’d love to read you...
Maybe it's launching a business, starting a podcast, or having that vulnerable conversation with your parents, your partner, or your boss.

Wherever you go, it follows.
And its mission?
To keep you from your potential.

So, how do you fight back?

Step 1: Listen without judgment
Notice the stories you tell yourself.
“I can’t.”
“What if I fail?”
“It’s not the right time.”
“This always happens to me.”

Just observe. Don’t react.

Step 2: Catch the judge
When you judge your own thoughts, you empower the Ghost Code.
Recognize it, then shift to understanding with this question:
Where did I learn this reaction?

This single question creates space.
It weakens the Ghost Code’s power and gives you authority over your thoughts.

Ask Yourself: What Do I Really Want?

Sit with that question. Not what sounds impressive. Not what feels safe. What do YOU want?

Your brain will answer if you give it time. Don’t rush.

Then move to:

Step 3: Take conscious action
This is where Targeted Thinking comes in.

It’s simple:

1. Know what you want

2. Define what steps lead you there

And when the Ghost Code reappears, and it will, you’ll recognize it and move forward anyway.

Step 4: Stay consistent through practice
Awareness and action are just the beginning.
Progress comes when you show up daily, especially when the Ghost Code returns.

You become who you practice being.

A Real-World Example

One of my clients shared a photo recently. He asked ChatGPT to create an image of his coach looking like the Wolf of Wall Street dealing self-awareness (yes, really).

We met in a Bogotá coffee shop in January.
He overheard me coaching and asked what I did.
We kept in touch, and he showed interest in working together.

Then the Ghost Code appeared.

Even though he was ready for change,
he’d tried coaching before with no real results.
He hesitated, thinking it might be too big of an investment in himself.
Maybe the timing wasn’t right. 
But deep down, he knew the timing would never be “right”.

Still, the knot in his stomach wouldn’t go away.
He couldn’t imagine spending another year feeling stuck.

So he made a choice.
He took the leap.
He chose to believe in his potential.

Just two months in, he sent me a voice note yesterday that said,
“You delivered big time.”

He’s moved from apathy to forgiveness.
From passivity to becoming of service to himself.

That’s the shift we’re all after. Reclaiming the Power of Choice.

Remember this:
You’re not alone.
The Ghost Code shows up for all of us.
But when you recognize it, accept it, and move forward (even in uncertainty) you win.

And if you ever need support on that path, I’m here for you.

Keep growing,
Your friend and coach
Carlos

PS: I didn’t like the wolf version of me so I had to get it re-done here’s my version